Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I did not marry a roomba.
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