if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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