She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
