i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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