Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
