She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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