she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
You can't just leave with hair like that
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
