butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Randomize