break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
