i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
