Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Boobs speak an international language.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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