I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Randomize
