There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
