Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
