Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
