Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
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