I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
