I smell stomach acid.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
