maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
