sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
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