Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
