my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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