he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
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