I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
You're breaking my sexual little heart
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