arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
