Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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