We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize
