Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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