I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
