Why are handjobs necessary in class?
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
