I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Randomize
