Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
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