yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Randomize