Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
I want to have your abortion
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
