let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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