She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Randomize
