Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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