you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
