What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize