I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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