i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
my sisters under your porch take her home
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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