I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Randomize
