I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
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