so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
