What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize
