Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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