Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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