wakey wakey hands off snakey
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Randomize
