i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
