That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
