the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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